So I am working on a presentation about Self-care to be delivered to an audience of Education Office Professionals in Maryland next month (whilst waiting to have lunch with Reggie!). I am trying to explain exactly why Western society is so f*cked up. Then, I had a phone conversation with a friend that helped me sum it up.
We were talking about how people in Houston go bat-shit crazy when it rains - at least when it comes to driving. I was telling him about how it is in the small town where my husband grew up and how you know when you hit the city limits because everyone is not in a hurry. He said something like, "I envy them."
Then it hit me. In our society, busyness, productivity, speed, efficiency and sacrifice are the qualities held in the highest regard when it comes to everyday life - at work, at home, everywhere. So we are basically telling ourselves that self-sacrifice + productivity = GOOD. I even experienced this first hand over the summer when my business slowed down so much. I actually felt useless a lot of the time.
We feel like we are "wasting time" if we just want to sit in the backyard and listen to the birds or watch an "America's Next Top Model" marathon. We feel guilty taking sick days off from work or if we have to stay home with an ill child or pet. We get denied promotions or recognition if we take the time to take care of our Selves.
Folks, this is crap.
If you have found a good balance of "have tos" and "want tos" in your life, then good for you. But if you haven't - and you know who you are - then please start thinking about ways to increase your level of Self-care. If you don't take care of you, then who will?
We shouldn't have to move to the caves of the Himalayas to feel guiltless about slowing down a little.
Shameless plug: If you want to know more about my ideas for Self-care, consider ordering my book. They should be ready to ship this afternoon! (WOO HOO!)
"Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions." -- Albert Einstein
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Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?
-- Marianne Williamson
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5 comments:
If the Devil can't make you bad he'll make you busy.
We all need to slow down.
Hey, just because you're comfortable wasting time, doesn't mean the rest of us have to be. Stop trying to slow us down so you can feel better about your relative lack of accomplishments. :)
"Waste of time" is all based upon POV. The time I spent over the weekend at home watching TV was great time for me. From the POV of me the worker, it was a waste of time because I wasn't accomplishing what I wanted to that day for my job. From the POV of me the husband, getting on this call with Japan at 6pm at night is a colossal waste of time.
So nearly all time is wasted! Depending on your perspective, of course.
An example of an exception would be the time I spent having lunch today. That was time well spent no matter how I look at it. Now, from YOUR point of view, it might have been wasted time.
Geez, so true. So true.
I do not feel at all guilty if I have no work to do, and will quite happily sit in the sun or watch a marathon of The O.C. When there's work waiting, however, the guilt seeps in.
Overall, in work and at home, I pretty much do what needs to be done, the basics if you will, and I am definitely NOT an overachiever!
PS: In this small town, things are not necessarily slower than in the big city.
You are right about "bat-crazy" driving habits in the rain around here.
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