deep thoughts...where did that "jack handy" fella go?

well, my car is still in the shop. you know the routine - "we'll have it out this afternoon." then you call around 3pm and they say, "sorry, it's going to be tomorrow." today, i can't get the service guy to return my calls. how hard is it to replace an alternator anyway? using one car yesterday went fine, but today the captain really couldn't work from home. so, i reserved an "economy" car from the rental place. we got there this morning and curiously, they had rented out all of their economy cars. so now i am driving around in a d0dge ram 1500 super cab. the darn thing is too long to fit into the garage! boo hoo.

***warning: the next part of this entry contains some spoiler material from harry potter and the half-blood prince***

so, i finished the aforementioned book last night, and contrary to the shallow label that non-rowling fans give to it, it was quite enjoyable and explored so many different aspects of the human psyche. i knew that snape killed dumbledore - i heard it on the radio. i wasn't prepared for the emotions that swept over me as i read that part of the story! i have read now 6 big, thick potter books, and i have become attached to some of the characters. i cried at the funeral held on the book's pages. i felt hatred swelling over me as i followed harry as he chased snape through the forbidden forest. if the actor who plays snape in the movies were to ring my doorbell at that moment, i would have tried my best to kick his ass! how displaced is that??

i have done this type of thing my whole life. i remember, in 3rd grade, that our teacher was reading a story. i don't remember what the story was about, but it involved a cat. someone in the story did something wrong to the cat, and all i could think was "how could she do that?" over and over. the tears started streaming down on my bus ride home, and some of the older kids were concerned about me. fast forward 25 years and i'm still doing it. i was bawling my eyes out at star wars 3, for heaven's sake! and now at the latest installment from j.k. rowling.

i thought about it and realized that it didn't really have anything to do with death itself. i am not scared of death, and firmly believe that people who die get the good end of the stick, as long as they have accepted Jesus and what He did on the cross. then i thought about abandonment. i had been neglected as a child, but that wasn't it, either. what i did finally come up with was that the people who died (or turned into darth vader) were dearly loved by characters i cared about. it matches real life! at a funeral, i always cry when i see the pain of others, not because someone is dead. i am such a caretaker.

in other news, have you heard the new bud lig*t commercial? they're soluting "mr. 80 spf sunscreen-wearing guy." even though there's only 24 hours in a day, you're prepared for 80. you can block out the sun and even suns from distant galaxies! ha! i needed a laugh.

carry on.