get a hobby

oh, goody. i seem to have made friends with some jehovah's witnesses. the interesting thing is that they don't really want to tell me about their beliefs or try to "convert" me. i told them up from that i have a church thankyouverymuch. but the ladies really have interesting things to say. i don't invite them in for coffee, but i do stand on the porch for 5 minutes and talk to them. unfortunately, they are like stray animals. you feed them once and they come back for more. today, i just didn't feel like chit-chatting. my mom and i cleaned the house this morning, which always makes my allergies flare up. more data to support the bubble!

the captain and i are trying to find a hobby to partake in together. he got some lists off of the internet last night. some of the hobbies were very amusing. take, for example:

1. sleeping - yeah, bring it on!
2. naps - see "sleeping."
3. cow watching - see, where i grew up, we wouldn't watch cows so much as tip them. but whatever.
4. raising goats - we could get rid of our garbage disposal! but the homeowner's association would be on us like white on rice. i swear, they planted bugs in our house.
5. cynicism - already doing that and loving it!
6. tea - hmmmm. 'shroom tea?
7. women - since i am one, i think i have that one covered
8. humming - hmmmm hmm hmmmmmm!
9. paranoia - that doesn't sound too fun, but give me some pot and i'll try it out.
10. unicycling - my crotch hurts at the thought.
11. men - nah. that would be a waste of time.
12. flirting - i may need lessons. i think i've forgotten how.
13. espionage - there's no way i would do that. you can't make me talk.
14. stupidity - while i don't really want to engage in this hobby, it is amusing to watch the plethora of people who do.
15. pillaging - i've always wanted to go into a crystal shop with a hammer. is that pillaging?
16. counterespionage - that may be more for the captain. but then again, maybe not.
17. counter-counterespionage - again, it wasn't me.
18. balancing things - i think i'll go get out our fine china and see if i am any good at this.
19. collecting tumbleweeds - this has to be my favorite. i wonder where i could find a good source of tumbleweeds to start my collection. anyone know? anyone?
20. smelling things - i can picture myself doing this for hours.
21. bagpipes - anyone got any for sale for a reasonable price?
22. nit-picking - i used to be real good at this. i should start practicing again.
23. strangeness - no explanation necessary
24. stopping at crosswalks - that would be a new and exciting adventure!
25. twiddling my thumbs - i've never been able to do a good twiddle. can anyone give me lessons"?

yes, these are real suggested hobbies. you can find the complete list here. have fun!