dream girl

i have been dreaming about the same person every night for weeks. sometimes she's in a lead role, sometimes she's a supporting actress, and sometimes she just makes a cameo appearance. but i am done now! i do not want to dream about her anymore. this morning's dream was so vivid that i was in a funk for a couple of hours afterward.

this girl befriended me when i moved to a new town and started a new school in 3rd grade. we were inseperable until high school, when our interests started drifting apart. i got a lot of my pre-adolescent identity from her. it drove my parents nuts. i liked the music she liked, the tv shows she watched, even the guys that she thought were cute. i was basically her in a different body for a few years.

she ended up marrying the best friend of my now-husband. we thought it was cool - best friends being married to best friends. but when i stopped partying, she kept on, and once again we drifted apart. a lot of nasty stuff happened with her family after that and basically i haven't spoken to her in 4 or 5 years now. i remember our last conversation like it was yesterday. the minute she found out i was in graduate school, she got cold and patronizing. she was always like that. she was all about herself and didn't give 2 shits about what i was doing. in retrospect, i don't even know why i hung around with her as much as i did. but i digress...i just want her to go haunt someone else's dreams.