move over, spider-man

if i were to be a superhero, i would be sweatwoman. thanks to my portuguese heritage, i tend to sweat, like, all the time. even if it's winter, i am sweating. my kid asks me why i'm so sweaty. i don't know how rabbit stands it.

anyway, sweatwoman would have the power to lift her armpits and squirt out a spray of nasty, nervous sweat with a stench that would stun any enemy. while the foe was rendered helpless, sweatwoman would proceed to tie him/her up with rope and duct tape and drop him/her off at the nearest police station. the cops would then have to give the villain several baths in vinegar and water to get the foul odor off. then no one in their cell would talk to them because they smell like sweat and vinegar.

so there. spider-man can kiss my butt. sweatwoman would have taken out doc ock in 5 seconds flat.

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