my inner redneck

yes, it's true. and i'm not ashamed of it! at the age of 8, i began my transformation into a redneck. we moved from a very big city to an itty, bitty town in the country. i tried to hang onto my "city ways" of wearing dresses and always using proper etiquette, but soon jeans became so much easier to climb through barbed wire fence in. and i learned that you can sit with your legs open a little when wearing jeans. i even learned that in the country, a "pond" was called a "tank." i soon lived in jeans and a t-shirt, was climbing trees, playing with trucks (which 4-wheeled over my barbies) and was almost constantly dirty. of course, this changed a little when i got into high school and started following the redneck fashion trends: jeans with legwarmers!

being an only child with no real friends around me, i was alone alot to hone my tree-climbing and fence-penetrating skills. that's also when i developed a love for reading and writing. yes, people - rednecks can read whole novels and maybe even write one or two!

i went to a junior college in a bigger little town. by then, i had developed a nice redneck accent, a taste for beer (even schaefer light), and could out-cuss the best of 'em. those were the days! the captain is from that town, and today we drove through the campus that we met at. it was bittersweet, adding to the sentimentality that i have been experiencing lately.

when i graduated with my associate of arts degree, i went to the university of houston. i lived in houston. i saw the benefits of houston. after a year or two, my accent faded into a neutral voice. another couple of years saw me all but give up swearing, and now, beer makes me so tired, i don't even bother. i took back my "city girl" persona that i had lived with the first few years of my life (except the road rage and etiquette).

yesterday, we were in said small college town at a relative's house for thanksgiving. it took me all of 5 minutes to start picking on everyone, cussing like a sailor, and using my redneck accent. i was even dubbed "sassy" by the captain's uncle. i have a redneck nickname! we had a lot of fun, dampered for me by one of my lovely headaches, or a cold, or sinus problems, or whatever the hell i have. so here i sit, in sweat pants, a bohemian top and slippers, embracing my inner redneck...at least for now.